I have not written anything since January. That’s crazy to think this year has flown by so fast. It is also fitting that this would be the driving the force of me putting pen to paper again (OK really fingers to keys but that sounds crazy, lol.)

So I got a call last Friday that I really never thought I would receive. Daddy called to tell me Poco had gotten cast in the stall and he found him when he went out to feed Friday morning. Erin and Pop got him up, gave him a shot a banamine and monitored him. He seemed to be doing pretty well, just recuperating from a bad situation. I told them to keep me updated and to let me know how he progresses. Everything seemed fine… and then it wasn’t.

Jody called me while I was finishing lunch and told me that maybe I should come home in case the vet doesn’t think it’s good. I calmly said OK. I wrapped up what I was doing at work and headed home. I was really in no hurry, because I had this horse in my life for the last 20 years and I guess I assumed he would be here forever. I had a gut feeling this was the end, but I ignored it. Because 20 years is a long time! Every major event in my life has involved this horse in some form. What do you mean that will not continue? That was the hardest part to stomach. Realizing that I would no longer see him, have him rub white hair all over me on my way somewhere or hear him nicker when I walk in the barn.

I was not there more than 5 minutes before we had to euthanize him. I knew as soon as I saw him, the best thing to do was to let him go and not make him suffer a minute longer than he had to. He was an amazing horse that achieved more than anyone ever believed, other than me. I always thought he was something special, even though we only spent $1500 from a hole-in-the-wall auction, he had more heart than most other horses I have climbed on. That heart took us further than I imagined. He took me to my first Congress, my first world show, we were top ten in the Nation for countless years (in 3 different divisions) and he taught me everything I needed to know at the time. He was the perfect step from my Ol’ Faithful mount, Dunny. He was a pain in my butt at times, and the challenge I didn’t realize I needed. But he took me places I had only dreamed of. He wasn’t the best but he competed with the best and at times won. I couldn’t have asked for a more exciting, challenging or memory filled journey than the one we lived. He was honest and he always tried. He had more personality than most people. You never doubted what he was thinking, good or bad. He had a way, even after all these years, he could challenge me to be better. He just had a way of making you work harder than you had before to climb higher than you had before.

Jody and Erin made the decision to have him cremated. In all honesty they asked me, but I couldn’t think about anything. Not burying him, cremating him or even where I was. He is the first animal I have ever had cremated, but it only seems fitting for the journey we had.

The memories are what you cling to at a time like this. Sometimes they help and sometime they make your heart ache. I would like to think I have spent more time laughing and smiling about the memories this week than crying, but I am not sure that statement is accurate. Either way I can’t help but think any current or future horses have a big set of shoes to fill.