If you know anything about me, you know I love coffee. I drink iced coffee all day, every day. So typical me, I was in the drive through of Starbucks not long ago. When I pulled up to pay, the barista working the window was young (19-22ish I would guess). She was very sweet, as most baristas are, I would say at Starbucks (there are exceptions, lol). She complimented my earrings. I thought it was such a sweet thing to notice and say (my hair is long and was down, so I was surprised she could even see them, lol). And she went on to talk to me about how she struggles to find cute jewelry, but other people can always find her the cutest things, which again was a compliment in itself. It was a testament that she was not just trying to find something to say to fill the time, but instead a true thought that she had. My thoughts on this go in two directions. My first thing, compliments go a long way. You never know what someone is facing or how your actions/reactions/words could affect them. But I assure you a compliment will almost always brighten someone’s day. I was talking with my Mom about this subject and she reminded me of a story that we both had happened to read at some point. The gist of the story was a little boy had packed his entire locker before heading home. He dropped his stuff on his way out and a classmate stopped to help him and through that talked to him as they had never really met/talked.  At the end of the day the first boy confided in him that he packed his entire locker before he headed home that day because he was going to commit suicide and he did not want his Mom to have to do it. The other boy stopping to help and befriend his changed the course of not only this boy’s day, but the rest of his life, literally. You really never know what the outcome of a conversation/compliment could mean to someone. Be kind. Be thoughtful. Show some compassion. Most of us lead very busy lives, but 5 minutes can really mean a lot to someone.

The second place my thought takes me with this is be genuine with your thoughts. I had a friend tell me one time that when she asks someone how their day is or what they have going on. She does not use it as something to fill the air between hello and goodbye. She genuinely wants to know how you are doing and what you have coming up. She said all too often you hear someone ask that and they don’t want an answer. They expect to get the normal, “good and yourself?”. I had never given this any thought, as I feel like I fell into the crowd of expecting and giving “good and yourself?”. But I reflected on what she said, and I think that as whole we have learned to answer automatically, without much thought. Once again, I do think there is an exception to this rule. But as a whole (and spending a ton of time on the phone with business calls over the years), we automatically answer as if it is from a written script. With the increase of social media and the decrease in human interaction, I do think we need to become more mindful with communication. Slow down and listen. Be more diligent with your thoughts and your answers. Don’t rush people through a conversation or an answer. Be genuine. People will recognize someone who if genuine. I don’t know about you, but throughout my “business years” I was told, if you smile on the phone, the caller hears it. That stuck with me and for the most part, I always try to connect and “smile on the phone”. I do feel like at times we get stuck in our “script” though. I think improving and showing compassion and being genuine will take some thought and work, but is creates great, long lasting relationships (business and personal).

So, take these thoughts and implement them. Slow down. Say something nice to a stranger.  Better yet, say something nice to a friend or family member that you have been neglecting. It will go further than you think and mean more than you can realize.